The Fun I Have With My Characters

Ladies and gents, I would like to introduce a character in my book who, despite our differences and his uncanny ability to be annoying, has been one of my friends for a very long time. He's changed a lot over the years--personality, age, even name--but I still love him in a strange, ironic way.

May I present...Maethar Eisling! Knight in shining armor, rescuer of damsels in distress, quiet and brave hero--

Maethar: I can sense the sarcasm, Izzy.

Izori: How many times must I tell you to stop calling me 'Izzy'?

Maethar: As many as you want to, Izzy.

Izori *glares at Maethar* Please, have a seat. I called you so I could interview you, not so you could mock me. Alright-y. Question one: what do you think of Ehrathiwel so far?

[Ehrathiwel is another character who I have also interviewed. I will hopefully share our little chat sometime soon.]

Maethar: Snobby.

Izori: Uh...care to elaborate?

Maethar: My impression is that she feels insecure, and she's making up for it by overly disguising her emotions. Like I said, snobby.

Izori: You're not so warm and open either, you know.

Maethar: But I'm not snobby. Ehrathiwel's immature, while trying to act all grown up.

Izori: Well, way to compliment [spoiler] your future wife!

Maethar: *colors violently and scowls*

Izori: Don't worry, she'll change. But more about you. If you think so poorly about Ehrathiwel, why do you decide to got track her down after she mysteriously disappears?

Maethar: Just because I think she's an immature snob doesn't mean I'd leave her to be killed by evil creatures! I am a knight in shining armor, you know.

Izori: Excuse me.

Maethar: And while I have your attention, please don't torture, kill, slash, or maim me. Elizabeth [another character, different book] told me what you did to her and Kate. You can marry me off or have me go on quests for missing snobs, but please don't hurt me.

Izori: Hmmm...I don't know I can promise you that much...

Maethar: *groan*

Izori: Okay, okay. I promise I won't kill you.

Maethar: And...what about the others...?

Izori: Oh, don't be so particular. I'll put your name on the petition.

Maethar: Who made you an author?!?

Izori: I did. So, moving on. Do you like the personality tweaks I gave you when you changed from Maki to Maethar?

Maethar: I like the name change, at least. As for the personality change, yeah, I don't mind. I understand my inner humor will be artfully and magnificently drawn out during your masterpieces?

Izori: Evidently your sarcasm, too. Oh, by the way, did you know I'm planning to have an Elvish princess fall in love with you and you'll break her heart?

Maethar: Why would I do that?!

Izori: She's even worse than Ehrathiwel is now.

Maethar: Oh. Well, why can't I marry Lady Swan? She's totally awesome!

Izori: Haven't you read the script?

Maethar: Uh...oh. Forget about that one. Don't want to be handing out free spoilers, you know. Even to your editor, that fairy queen in disguise as a blogger, dancing extraordinaire, what's her name...

Izori: Shush! You mean iGirl. You almost blew her cover, nitwit!

Maethar: *sigh* Are we done yet?

Izori: Not quite. Can you list five words describing how you see your personality?

Maethar: Charming, heroic, amazing...

Izori: Egotistical?

Maethar: Hush, Izzy. Observant. Gentlemanly. Inwardly witty. Self-controlled.

Izori: That was seven! Seven! Don't you follow instructions?!

Maethar: You know, I can tell you've done NaNoWriMo before because you're absolutely obsessed with word counts.

Izori: Why didn't you do FIVE?!

Maethar: It was a long day, wasn't it, Izzy? Too much algebra? Even after I helped you with the test?

Izori: You weren't supposed to say that!

Maethar: Well, if you're no longer interviewing me, I suppose I can leave...

Izori: Most absolutely not! Get back here. Now, try to be serious. On a scale of one through ten, how complicated do you think the plot of the book is?

Maethar: Hmmm. In Dun Zarum, greedy noblemen are fighting for the throne of the deceased king. One gains control and promptly exiles all nobles loyal to late King Faor. In the meantime, I'm searching for Ehrathiwel in the north forests and bump into the banished nobles. We're drawn to a wraith dwelling, where Ehrathiwel's being held, and realize we're all in a lot of danger. At the same time, we're still in need of a cure from the deadly plague in Dun Zarum. I'd say...eleven.

Izori: Thank you. Now, if only I could get you this chatty in my book, O silent, strong hero.

Maethar: That is the final straw. Now, where'd you put the chocolate, Izzy?

Do you see how much respect that character shows me? None at all. Absolutely none. Thank you very much, Maethar.

Yours without wax,

Izori